Speak Your Peace: Rafiki Shyne Dave

This piece was originally performed at Cha Island on March 26, 2015 for our local Speak Your Peace! event. It was amazing.

Success Story

Sometimes, people want to hear a success story. They want to hear about the guy who was bullied for years, rose above the pain, and got his life together. They want to hear a romantic rendition of a queer cinderella story coupled with beautiful transition, "this boy was born female and now look at him!", or when specifically talking with /me/, "I keep forgetting...he/him, got it, I'll try harder next time." I appreciate you, more than words can express, but I'm trapped.
Trapped as a boy, trapped as a girl, not manly enough, not pretty enough, desperately clinging onto a time someone said I was beautiful and didn't care what that meant and now -- anyone can grab a movie on Netflix, or take a walk to a gay bar where you get to see two hot chicks making out, and all I can ever think is damn -- is it too late to go back?
I cannot erase the last two years of my life, gender fluidity, gender fuckery, gender creativity, my gender is a hurricane, I've never been more me (free), and I'm still picking up the pieces when I knocked down a closet door -- for the second time.

Sometimes, people want to hear a success story and I know many. But the next time anyone throws a camera in my face, I'm going to tell /my/ story, and I'm going to say that I fight every day just to be okay, but I'm still here breathing -- And that in itself is powerful.

 

--Rafiki Shyne Dave