PUNK POETRY: Beth by Melody Creek

beth

the summer of 2002, i turned thirteen

i spent my days by the pool, 

eating ice cream, 

watching my friends braid each other’s hair

i spent that summer in love with my life

you had an abortion.

we were never close friends, 

truthfully i was a bit skeptical of you,

because your best friend always looked like she would beat my ass,

but i now know she was protective of you when others should have been. 

i told my mom i felt sorry for you but she scoffed because

abortions aren’t talked about in my family

because it’s a sin, so i was told,

but you were thirteen and my first thought was, will you bleed out, and

who will braid your hair while you recover?

my aunt’s mom called you and your family -trash- and 

-how could you take an innocent life- 

but the rumor was your boyfriend was twenty five and your parents let him stay at your house

in your bed, in your pants

because if you were out of their hair, they didn’t care who played with your’s. 

one day after color guard you were cramping on the field, 

bent over, crying from pain? sadness? all of the above?

people at school called you selfish but i thought you were quiet brave

and i should have told you that. 

i tried to find you on social media but it’s as if you’ve disappeared

and i’m sorry i wasn’t who i am today when i was thirteen

because i would have driven you to your appointment-

goddamn, you weren’t even old enough to drive-

and i would have lifted your head up high and told you that one day it would be okay.

i’m a feminist now, an advocate for women’s rights

i still eat ice cream by the pool and i’d love for you to come by one day and braid my hair,

and i’ll hold your hand as you cry and i’ll say

i’m so fucking proud of you.

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